In an era of crumbling schools and slashed education budgets, it’s tough getting our youth all the school supplies they need. But through creative fundraising, 7-year-old Adam Benson sold enough chocolate bars to raise enough money to buy books for everyone in school except Greg Williams.
Adam was this year’s star performer in Peabrook Elementary’s annual Candy4Kidz fundraiser. Students typically sell candy bars door to door, but Adam had bigger ideas to support 99.3% of the student population.
At the beginning of the fundraiser, Adam’s father, a managing director at a major investment bank, took his soon to work. “All I did was go to Daddy’s (office), held up pictures of candy, and asked in my politest voice ‘will you buy some candy so that me and everyone else at school except Greg can have new stories?”
“Greg is too stupid to read and ugly and he doesn’t get any books because he’s a big fat meanie,” Adam clarified.
Principal Jane DeSilva was ecstatic at Adam’s success. “With this windfall, we’ll be able to replace our outdated 1994 textbooks, and still have enough money left over to replenish the art classroom’s supply closet. Most people don’t know that this fundraiser is actually our biggest revenue stream so it’s a huge relief that Adam was able to step up despite our – his – hatred of Greg.”
Despite the admiration of his teachers and classmates, Adam remains humble. “I just wanted to do a good thing for all my friends. It made them happy and my teachers liked it too. My favorite new book is The Grand Hotel and we all like it, except for Greg, who didn’t get one because he was crying and peeing his pants at the same time.
When reached for comment, Greg had just finished crying in the bathroom. “I just want to read Baby Bear’s Big Day too but no one will share,” he whispered between sobs. “I don’t know why no one likes me,” he added. Greg wiped a final tear from his eye before putting on his glasses, turning into a little four-eyes, snot-nosed, good-for-nothing prick.
